This last week has been pretty hard for me. My grandmother passed away. I only knew her for the last 10 years of my life. I'm just grateful that I was able to have some relationship with her. What has been adding to my sadness is the fact that she lived down in St. George, and I wasn't able to be down there with my mom while she goes through this. I've been calling her every day just to let her know she is in my thoughts and I just want her to be able to talk to me about her feelings. I wish I had a picture of her to put in this post, but I don't. I'm hoping that as my mom goes through her things, she'll find a picture and I'll be able to have it and I'll put it up. She wasn't very old, but she wasn't in good health. She was fine and then within 36 hours of going to the hospital she had passed away. Thinking about it makes me sad, and I've had to keep myself busy so I don't get too sad. But I think if I can get my feelings into writing, I'll feel better. I deeply cherish the moments I spent with her. I was glad that I got to see her a few weeks ago when she came up for my cousins wedding. When she came to my house to visit, she said something to me that I will never forget. She said that I was the first one of her grandchildren to call her Grandma. I always knew I was the leader and not the follower, but because I have that memory of her I feel that much closer to her. I'm sad that she won't be alive when (and if) I have a baby girl. That would have been the 4th generation for her. I will miss her very much.

R.I.P. Grandma Barbra. I love you!